Be-You-tiful {Through the Media}

                  As I flip through the new addition of People magazine, I check out all the perfection and drama that is the epitome of Hollywood. I envy Carrie Underwood’s entire life. I mean, she has perfect legs, a perfect husband, a perfect baby, and she can sing. It really isn’t fair to all the rest of us. I also scoff at the celebrities who have let their bikini bodies go. I am constantly consuming media for celebrities. At any given moment, my TV is sure to be on E!. I wouldn’t dare miss a rerun of Keeping Up with the Kardashians. If Blake Lively and Ryan Reynolds never got married, I would be little less complete. Hello, #relationshipgoals. We are always looking up to celebrities, but have you wondered what this media is doing to our self-esteem and overall confidence?

Being a college girl and a regular consumer of popular culture, I look up to celebrities. I envy Lauren Conrad’s collection of Chanel purses and the amount of Louboutin heels Blake Lively owns. If I only was as pretty as Hayden Panettiere or as witty as Jennifer Lawrence. It makes me feel as though I am not adequate enough. Okay, I know I’m never going to be famous, but maybe I can take an Instagram picture as good as Kylie Jenner.

Media creates this world where celebrities seem so much more important than normal people. Magazines only have certain girls on their covers. If you are thin, you are seen as beautiful. Media doesn’t like to celebrate different. Because of that, consumers like to hide their differences. Growing up I had bright red hair and pale skin. I didn’t feel confident because I thought the most beautiful girls had blonde hair and tan skin. Where did I get this idea? Media. But I think our differences are what make us most beautiful. Now, I think my hair is my best physical feature. It makes me stand out, which I love. I think it’s beautiful when a girl who is 5'11" is confident enough to wear heels. It’s refreshing when girls are confident enough to not wear makeup. So what if Beyoncé has a thigh gap? We should all feel beautiful in the skin were in.

Media has also created unrealistic expectations in the relationship department. Yes, I’m talking about The Notebook. We should all be looking for that guy who treats us right and with respect, but chick flicks have given us a form of fantasy. Sorry to burst your bubble, but a man probably isn’t going to build the dream house you described when you were 16. It just isn’t realistic. This causes unhappiness when that doesn’t happen to you. We are not in the Upper East Side, and you may not have the Chuck to your Blair, but you can be happy with the life that you have. We are all blessed in so many different ways and we should not lose confidence because we don’t have the "perfect" relationship.

Why do we idolize celebrities so much? For example, Carrie Underwood seemingly has the perfect life. I’m envious of her body, her husband, her singing talent, and her beauty. Every single one of these things is shallow. All of the reasons that I find myself inferior to these people are all superficial. Where will Carrie’s legs be in 10 years? Where will Kendall Jenner’s selfie taking ability get her? Most of the reason we are so consumed with celebrities is temporary. We should admire someone because they’re beautiful not only outside, but inside as well. The only thing that will matter in years is who you are on the inside. Outward beauty and fame is temporary, but being a kind, genuine person lasts a lifetime. The confidence you have in yourself should not come from Instagram likes or having the perfect beach bod, but in striving to be your best self.

Post Written by Guest Blogger, Sarah Wilson; Edited by UNA Panhellenic 

Be-YOU-tiful {Confidence}

As a fellow member of the female population, I am here to be the first one to tell you that I have, and still, struggle with feeling confident in who I am. I doubt and discredit myself daily. Confidence comes in ups and downs. Some days it seems like I just don't have it in me to accomplish my goals, reach my dreams, or even make it through the day. While other days, with the right outfit and a good hair day, I feel like Beyonce..... Can anyone relate?

See, the thing is, most of us girls measure our self-worth by comparing ourselves to other people. Whether she is more successful, smarter, prettier, has a better personality, has a "perfect" relationship, gets more likes on social media, goes to a "better" school, and the list could go on for days. We discredit ourself: our own abilities, ideas, talents, passions... the things that makes us who we are. Our own individuality. It is so incredibly easy to feel like we don't measure up. I know personally this has always been a struggle for me. "Comparison is the thief of joy". True statement. But comparison is also the thief of confidence, self-worth, and ultimately, individuality. 

The problem is that we base our own worth off of the approval of other people. Even if we don't like to admit it. We post a picture on Instagram and don't feel good about ourselves unless we get at least 100 likes... and we scroll through the "likers" ten times to see who approves of it. Filter, edit, crop. We take and retake a picture because we feel ugly and wouldn't dare let someone see us on social media when our faces are bare and hair is a mess. 

But, in reality, our individuality is beautiful. Being unique is an adventure. It makes life interesting and exciting. Different goals, passions, talents, and ideas are useful and absolutely necessary. Our differences makes us who we are and we should embrace them and learn to {l o v e} ourselves rather than beat ourselves up. 

This post is for everyone who is struggling with not feeling good enough. I know it's hard when we constantly compare ourselves to others and lose sight of the fact that we were created for a purpose. A purpose that is part of a greater picture we might not even understand at this twenty-something inbetween stage of our lives. We have different qualities and quirks and they make us uniquely and individually beautiful. 

Embrace you. Embrace the fact that your hair curls at the ends and your thighs touch. Embrace the size of your waist and the number on the scale. Loving yourself is the most freeing and beautiful thing you can ever do. 

Because no one can be a better you. No one has been through the exact struggles that you have and no one can fulfill the plan of your life except you! At the end of the day all you have is yourself. When you lie down to go to sleep and your thoughts race, remind yourself that you are the person that you are for a reason. You are on this planet for a {u n i q u e} purpose and that is an amazing thing. Believe in yourself because you are more beautiful than you believe, smarter than you think, and stronger than you.

Post Written by Guest Blogger, Summer Richardson; Edited by UNA Panhellenic

Be-YOU-tiful

Everyone has something that they may not be confident about or some fear that keeps us up late at night. We are an imperfect people and there are always going to be things that we are self-conscious about. It could be that stutter that you get when you are nervous, the size of your feet, the inability to get in front of a crowd and speak with purpose. We are all imperfect, but that imperfection is humanizing.

Sometimes, we allow our fears and emotions to prevent us from seizing opportunities because we are lacking in confidence. We may be afraid to stand up and take charge in a situation because we are afraid of being talked about. We become complacent because we lack confidence.

It is important to remember that there are haters everywhere. You are never going to be able to please everyone. You may not have the perfect body, you may not have the perfect voice, you may not have the best athletic ability, but you are YOU and there is nothing that you can do about that.

You must take some stock in who you are. Whether you are quiet, nerdy, loud, funny, sarcastic, introverted, extroverted, or anywhere in between, OWN who you are. Be that person and be that person on a DAILY BASIS.

Recently, I got the opportunity to hear Erin Fischer speak at Panhellenic Academy. She was one of the opening speakers and she spoke on the topic of confidence. She shared with us some of her habits that she developed on her journey to being a more confident person. Here are some tips from the brave Ms. Fisher:

#1- Limit your limiting beliefs- Don’t let the fact that someone has told you that you are not good at something keep you from doing it. If you let go of those limits, you can change your behaviors.

#2-Build your reserve of resiliency-Failure is inevitable. You are going to fail, but the failure is not what it is important. What is important is that you have the strength and the courage to keep going even after you fail. Accept your failure, own in, and learn from it.

#3-Get real- Do not be afraid to ask for help. You are not a perfect person and you are going to need help at some point. Be real with yourself and realize when you need that assistance you can JUST ASK!

#4-Help others on their confidence journey- Sharing your talent not only benefits the person that you are helping, but you are going to find joy in sharing your talents.

#5-Identify your fears so you can increase your self-awareness- By knowing your fears and being aware of then, you can work on getting over those fears and gaining confidence in the face of those fears.

#6- You can learn a lot from the confidence of rock stars- Rock stars DO NOT CARE about the people who did not buy their tickets. They are only worried about the people who are bought their tickets and come to hear them play. Do not worry or lose sleep over the people who do not buy YOUR ticket. There are people who are in your corner. You should appreciate and “play” for the patrons that are behind you.

So, dance like no one is watching, sing your heart out in the shower, tell that corny joke, don’t let them put Baby in a corner! Be who you are and be as genuine as you can be and go into the world and BE CONFIDENT!

Post Written by Guest Blogger, Sarah Ann Keeter; Edited by UNA Panhellenic